Sunday, December 28, 2008

zine reviews

zine reviews:
Firehazard #2 Katrina 259 Williams St. Prov. RI 02906
Punk rock, anarchy, food, kombucha, gardens, rage, friends, mental health, healing, books, bikes, trees, crushes, avacados, pizza, accordians, tea.

This zine starts out with a youth liberation manifesto and moves through a little bit of everything: receipes and stories and lists like "50 things I do when I feel like shit about being sexually assaulted". It's got really great drawings and feels like being let in. She says "a lot of times I let other people's problems surpass mine - maybe it's ok sometimes to stay home, sit in bed, drink tea..." and that's what it feels like. I want to stay in bed and put my desk on my lap and write a sweet zine like this too.

It's Not the End of the World! building a life with limp wrists: a zine about carpel tunnel, endonitis and how to keep your job from ruining your life Ocean Capewell POB 40144 Pittsburgh PA 15201
includes ips for specific jobs, like bike pizza delivery, dishwashing, construction, etc.

Monday, November 3, 2008

learning good consent zine

I have a new zine that I helped edit that's just out. It's called Learning Good Consent and is $5 though the mail - cindy pob 29 athens oh 45701

There's a pdf of the zine posted here:

also, did I mention me and my sister just bought a house! and acres of forest and fields, and a 5 car garage to start the rock camp for grownup girls and other people who weren't encouraged to play music!

Friday, October 31, 2008

sister shuffle

Sister Shuffle and doris speaking tour (everything is the band unless it has some weird italic title that sounds like the title to a weird speech thing.

Tuesday 11 - Pittsburgh. zine reading and show with Bad Daughtors , artnoose, some others. 5532 Baywood. 6:00 potluck, 7:00 start

Wed 12 - Baltimore with Abiku and Mian the Monster at 9:00 1729 Maryland Ave

Thurs 13 New Paltz - Breaking Silence: the Radical Necessity of Telling Our Stories I think it's around 7:00 at the Student Union Building in room 100

Friday 14 Brooklyn The Fort. 1414 Lincoln Pl, brooklyn ny

Saturday 15 Boston paper cut zine library. at the democracy center 45 Mt Auburn St in Harvard Square. with superpositive hiphop by Sarah Bean, off kilter rockcombo Frogs! Everywhere!, Up the Creek = lulabyes, + short movies. + maybe I have to talk about zines or something.

Sunday 16 Providence RI with Queening 9:00 115 Empire St at AS200

Monday 17 Boston Self-publishing, feminist zines, and social change or something like that. speech at the Radcliff, Schlesinger library. (That's Harvard!) 1:00 (I think. maybe noon)

Monday 17 Brattleboro VT with Uke of Phillips, corners and another amazing band.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

please help

A good friend of mine is in the hospital with extensive injurys, from what I think was a hate crime. She is a transgender woman. She's going to be in the hospital for awhile, and desperately needs financial help. her hospital bills are covered, but we need to keep paying her rent so she won't loose her housing for when she gets out, and so she can set up ongoing care for after she gets out of the hospital. If you can, please donate. thank you.
you can donate through pay pal at or send a check to me Cindy Crabb pob 29 Athens OH, 45701, and I'll send it to her caretaker.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

punk problems radio show

Arwen and Erin are recording the new "You Got A Problem"
You Got a Problem
A new radio show with advice for punks from punks. Special guests. Caustic music. Strong opinions. Hilarious asides.

Stupid problems? Terrible problems? Call: (206) 600-1030 or Email:

You call or email us with your punk problem and your phone number, and a good time to call you on Sunday, and we'll call you and give you advice. It will be posted on the MRR Radio website.

Feel free to spread the information far and wide! We're trying to do this monthly, and we'll need a backlog of punk problems! Thanks


*please be aware that the following may trigger survivors of assault.*


I write this email to bring attention to the assault and murder of a woman I knew.

Sali was living in Oaxaca, Mexico teaching women's self defense, working for indigenous rights and dancing when she was raped brutally murdered this past week.

In searching the web for news of her death, I was saddened, though not shocked to find that the only outlets reporting on this horrific tragedy were independent media, and small foreign press.Like many of the horrors committed the world over, the assault and murder of a woman, especially a woman doing social justice work, will never get the sort of mainstream press that is given to movie stars getting DUI's, or an NFL firing (both top stories on internet news today.)

Sali was a passionate and tough-ass woman whose murder I heard about only because she is part of my small community.

According to the National Organization for Women, 'Every day four women die in this country as a result of domestic violence, the euphemism for murders and assaults by husbands and boyfriends. That's approximately1,400 women a year, according to the FBI.' And, 'Every year approximately 132,000 women report that they have been victims of rape or attempted rape, and more than half of them knew their attackers.It's estimated that two to six times that many women are raped, but do not report it.'

How many of these women's stories do we hear. More importantly, how isit that more than four times as many women are raped every year (that being a low estimate based on reported rapes ONLY) in the U.S. alone as die from cervical cancer, yet we have public service announcements, and government funded programs to get our teenage girls shots to 'protect' themselves from the latter. Maybe if a girl could get a shot to prevent rape. Maybe we could just make it the woman's responsibility to prevent rape.... wait, we already do. Where is the outrage for the terror that more that half the world's population lives with, being targets of sexual violence and control.

What about the more than 350 women who have been raped and murdered since 1993 in Juarez, Mexico alone. Most of the cases still unsolved.

What about the over 3,200 Guatemalan women who have been abducted and murdered, with many of them raped, tortured, and mutilated between 2000 and 2007. (for more info., )

I am sending this email out to make sure that much of the work that Sali was living for, and died in the midst of is left overwhelmingly unfinished. It is left to us.

I write this knowing that the women reading this email live with this everyday on some level.

I write this with the hope that you will forward this story. That you will remember Sali and want to make sure that she is not forgotten.

That you will find every way possible in your life to challenge and destroy sexism, in all it's forms.

I write this so that you help me create a different world for my yet to be born child.

Because I am terrified.

- Quinn Russell, Olympia, WA


The following is the initial report about Salli's death. Updates follow.
International Human Rights Accompanier Raped and Murdered in Oaxaca

by Julie Webb-Pullman, New Zealand
The body of United States citizen Marcella 'Sali' Grace was found on September 24 in a deserted cabin 20 minutes from the village of San José del Pacífico, in the state of Oaxaca, Mexico. She had been raped, brutally beaten, and killed. A villager who had gone to feed dogs in the area noticed a bad smell and informed the municipal authorities, who found and removed the body.Julieta Cruz, a friend of Sali's, was only able to identify her from her tattoos, as her face was unrecognisbale.

Sali had been working as an 'international accompanier' in Oaxaca, whereby foreign nationals provide protective accompaniment to human rights workers, political activists,and members of social organisations who are under threat,such as members of the Asemblea Popular de los Pueblos de Oaxaca (APPO) who are continuing to suffer widespread repression by the corrupt government of Ulises Ruis Ortiz.In the weeks before her death Sali had told friends and colleagues that she believed she was under surveillance, and was being subjected to political persecution.
In a practice that has become only too familiar with the deaths and disappearances of hundreds of Oaxacans since 2006, the Oaxacan Attorney General's Office is dragging its heels,doing little to progress the investigation or bring the killer/s to justice. Despite the existence of witnesses able to identify those responsible for Sali's rape and murder,they have not been interviewed. Friends and colleagues of Sali's trying to find out what happened to her have been denied access to any information, including the case number and autopsy results, leading to growing concern that her murder is related to the widespread repression and persecution of social movements in Oaxaca, and is now being directly targeted at international observers. Many believe that the intellectual authors of Sali's death are the same as those who ordered the repression against the people of Oaxaca in their struggle for justice and freedom over the last few years.
'In the face of these bloody events,and for the brutal cruelty used against compañera Sali, wedon't disregard that this could be a clear message directed at all the people of Oaxaca, as well as the compañeros insolidarity from different parts of the world; we say this based on the recent national and international news which says that APPO members were the ones who killed U.S.journalist Bradley Roland Will. We are worried about the distortion of information like this, and about the obvious bureaucratic slowness with which the authorities involvedare already treating this investigation, and that these things will prevent us getting true justice for our compañera,' said a spokesperson of the Oaxacan women's movement.

Marcella 'Sali' Grace
In a cruel irony, she also noted that one of Sali's activities in Oaxaca was teaching women's self-defense courses, in recognition of the endemic violence against women there and to help them walk 'free and respected.'
Oaxacan women's groups have been joined by other social movements and individuals to demand that the Oaxaca Attorney General's Office immediately clarify the facts surrounding Sali's murder, conduct a full and speedy investigation, and bring the perpetrator/s to justice. They are also protesting outside United States consular offices in Mexico, encouraging them also to demand justice for their citizen.
'Enough is enough of the murders, violence and hate against women who fight for justice,' they said.
Those who Sali died trying to protect are now calling on concerned people everywhere, especially other human rights workers and women, to join their demand for a proper investigation into her death, by sending an email to them at or telephoning (01 951) 5178190CIPO


Mexican Activists Turn Over Mexico City Man to Police in Sally Grace Eiler Murder Case
by Kristin Bricker - September 27, 2008

Last night Mexican police transferred Omar Yoguez Singu, 32, to the Oaxacan attorney general's custody for murdering 20-year-old Marcella'Sally' Grace Eiler. The AP reports that he claims he had consensual sex with Sally, then killed her with a machete during an argument.

Yoguez Singu was captured thanks to the quick action of Oaxacan activists who publicized her murder internationally.

Yoguez Singu raised his friends' suspicions when he returned to Mexico City from a recent trip to San Jose del Pacifico, were locals discovered Sally's decaying and mutilated body in a cabin. They noticed that he was injured and that his two dogs were missing, so they asked him what happened. Yoguez Singu reportedly told them that one of his dogs bit a child in the community, so locals tried to kill the dog with a machete. He allegedly told them that he was injured attempting to save the dog.

Thanks to the widely disseminated statement signed by Oaxacan organizations that Sally worked with, people in Yoguez Singu'scircle of friends knew that a woman was murdered in San Jose del Pacifico while Yoguez Singu was there. They called activists in Oaxacato confirm Yoguez Singu's story about his dogs.

Townspeople from San Jose del Pacifico denied Yoguez Singu's story. They said bothof the dogs were still with them because Yoguez Singu had left withoutthem. They also reportedly said he was the last person they saw with Sally before she disappeared.

When Yoguez Singu's friends confronted him about his lies, he reportedly confessed to them. His friends kept an eye on him while Oaxacan activists made the trip to Mexico City to obtain an arrest warrant.

When the arrest warrant was finalized, activists reportedly arranged to meet police in a supermarket to hand over Yoguez Singu. The AP reports that he was arrested on Wednesday, September 24.

Activists were quick to place Sally's murder in the context of rampant unchecked violence against women in Oaxaca. They note that aggressors are hardly ever punished for their crimes. 'There is no justice in Oaxaca,' said a spokesperson for the Popular Indigenous Council of Oaxaca - Ricardo Flores Magon (CIPO-RFM).

For further updates please visit:

asheville survivors art project

This is from Asheville NC Survivors group:

Shit you have always wanted to say.
So, many months ago when some friends and I started kicking around the idea of this art show we came up with an idea for a piece that we wanted to do. (IF YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE ART SHOW, GO TO MY BLOG- the art show info is under the R.A.W. project on the sidebar). Myself, Laura, and Anna Young are heading this thing up, but it lives on participation from multiple folks.
Here's the skinny-
We want to record you saying the shit that you have always wanted to say.... the things you would have screamed at your abuser, The questions you would have had for your aunt who knew what was happening but did nothing, The comebacks you had for that guy who objectified you on the street, The tears you have cried by yourself- all of it, any of it. It matters and deserves to be heard... in addition to the fact that it feels fucking rad to get that stuff out!
There is going to be a location near downtown Asheville where we can do the recording basically any time of day (nice and private). It can be video or just audio if you want. It doesn't have to be composed, or well thought out. It can be to many people about many events, the world in general, to one person, or a love letter to yourself-Whatever needs to come out.
Eventually it will be thrown together in some sort of audio video something-or-other.
If you know that you would like to participate, or want more details, contact me at

Thanks so much for considering participating. Please fell free to forward this to other folks as well.
much love
Lindsey Simerly

Friday, September 19, 2008

sister shuffle

We're playing on Wednesday at the Union
here's some lyrics:


Act Up, Annie Lenox, Audre Lorde, Androgyny,
Annie Sprinkle, Cherie Moraga, Cyper and the Snow, Cell 16,
The Dyke March, Daniela, Discrimination Documentation Project,
Guerilla Girls, Gertrude Stein, Gay Liberation

We won't take for granted everything you organized and fought for
Don't you take us for granted
We will fight, we will fight, we will fight!

Harvey Milk, HotHead Piason, Indigo Girls, Amy Rae,
Joan Jet, James Baldwin, Jacks of Color, OK!
Kate Millet, Lesbian Avengers, Names Quilt Project Fed Up Queers
Ruby Fruit Jungle, Radical Cheerleaders, Snarla, Riot Grrrrl

We won't take for granted everything you organized and fought for
Don't you take us for granted
We will fight, we will fight, we will fight!

Sarah Schulman, Street Trans Action Revolutionaries,
Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, Stonewall, Silvia
Sex Panic! The Gay 90's! Sister Spit! Wilie and Joe!

Without you, I'd be invisible. Without you, I'd be dead.


tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me
We can trust eachother now
tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me
My arms around you dear
tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me
Your deepest secrets scared
tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me
There's nothing here to fear

There were days of murderous rage
I tried to plug your ears
There were nights I knew nothing about
I couldn't protect you
I couldn't protect you
Like no one protected me

I want revenge! someday, someway.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

abortion doulas

this is a link to a really interesting article about abortion doulas. click here for link

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

november events

My band Sister Shuffle is going on a mini tour in November plus I'm doing a speaking thing in New Paltz NY, and am trying to get another student group to sponsor me to speak somewhere to make some money on the way - like in Providence RI or Philadelphia or Boston. (so if you're in a student group that's got funding and wants to spend some of it - I can do a talk on feminism/ breaking silence/ zines and self-education.

Here's the tenative schedule:
Tuesday 11 - Pittsburgh. Geoffs back porch
Wed 12 - Baltimore
Thurs 13 New Paltz (speaking and band)
Friday 14 Brooklyn (the fort)
Saturday 15 Boston (zine library)
Sunday 16 Providence RI (AS211 or something like that)
Monday 17 Brattleboro VT

call for submission - zine on loss, grief, families, survival

I got this call for submission + am going to write for it, and thought you might want to too.

we're golden
a zine about loss, grief, families, and survival

on november 15, 2007, my father committed suicide. at the time, my family was in the midst of declaring bankruptcy, our house was going into foreclosure, and i had been out of school for three months because my parents couldn't afford the private school education we had decided on a year before. my father had attempted suicide in august, but failed the first time. i guess the second time we failed him.

we're golden is a documentation of my first year of grief. month by month. tear by tear. memory by memory. dedicated to my beautiful father and friend, john "two", in hopes that his life, and the life i've started to muddle through without him, can bring comfort, change, and perhaps even support as you grapple through your own stories of heartache, loss, or struggle.

pain, along with grief, is extremely individual. and for that purpose, i'm requesting submissions for we're golden from those who would like to share their own insights or stories on matters pertaining, but not limited to: suicide, death, families, bereavement, illness, financial burdens, friendship, therapy, education, the idea of "home", ...

what was your friend's memorial service like? what was it like to move out of your childhood home? what helped you through your grandparent's illness? what did your friend's do when your mother got sick? what helped? what didn't help? what could you do to help your friend through their depression? how did you support yourself through school? after school? when did you finally decide to seek help with bereavement? when did you realize that therapy was/wasn't helping? what band, author, person, movie, helped you through your grief?

every one of you has a story to tell. maybe you've told it before, maybe you tried to but couldn't, maybe you could barely make sense of the story yourself. but now i'm asking you to tell your story or remember a person you've lost in whatever way you like. the ultimate goal of this zine is to bring beauty and aid out of the pain we've felt; to remember the fights and the people; to make sense of our stories, and to help you make sense of yours.

what's really helped me through my grief is being able to talk about my dad - sharing my memories of the 19 years i got to spend with him, and ultimately, talking through what went wrong. it's painful and sad of course, but what's kept me sane is hearing other people's stories. being reminded that people before me have survived their ordeals or are still in the midst of their battles. knowing that our fragile selves have been tested and maybe, if you've found peace, i can too.

the release date will be january 15, 2009, which would have been my father's 59th birthday. i'm hoping to have each chapter be one month of the year and to have an outside submission in between each month. it's going to be a bit massive, yes, and very ambitious, but i think the end result will be something really important and meaningful, and i hope most of all helpful. submissions could be in whatever form you choose: story, poem, song, photograph, artwork, even a golden piece of advice or lesson learned, etc. the more variety, the better. please feel free to submit anonymously as well. any help, guidance, suggestions or support are of course encouraged and appreciated.

i haven't decided on a deadline, but i'd say december 1st is a safe date. you can email me at gmereg at gmail. real mail is great too! you can send me stuff at
43 hathaway road
bronxville, ny 10708

thanks for listening and happy september
love, grace

call for submission - zine on Physical Illness

This was sent to me by a friend of a friend. (it's not me putting it together, but it looks like a really great project!)

Call for Submissions on Physical Illness

I am currently seeking submissions for a zine/pamphlet on physical
illness. This project aims to give voice to the experiences of people
living with illness, serve as a resource for those who are diagnosed
with illness, and further the dialogue around issues related to support
and illness. While I am principally seeking submissions from those who have experienced or are currently living with a serious physical health problem, I am also very interested in submissions from those who have indirectly experienced illness: caregivers, community members, partners, family members, etc.

Some possible topics include:
Personal narratives of living with illness • Illness and support within left /
radical / DIY scenes • Intersections of race / gender / sexuality / class / culture and illness • Experiences with doctors, hospitals and treatments • Body image / identity and illness • Disempowerment / empowerment of illness • Mental health and physical illness • Suggestions for navigating the world of being a ‘patient’ • The experiences of being a caregiver • Suggestions for providing support to someone living with illness • Creating and sustaining community support networks • How life changes after a diagnosis • Living with multiple diagnoses • Illness as taboo •
Insurance • The financial burden of illness • Sex and illness • Illness and creativity • Illness and isolation • The invisibility of illness

The deadline for submissions is December 30, 2008.

Please be in touch with questions and submission ideas:

Spread the word!

Thursday, August 28, 2008

upcoming events

Sister Shuffle Shows: Athens Ohio - Aug 8 at the Smiling Skull with From the Depths and Spoonboy.
Aug 24 at the Union

Zine Making Workshop and maybe a Fertility Awareness, Self-exam, ME overview workshop at LADYFEST DAYTON! Aug 13!

Monday, August 18, 2008


I have a bunch of new stuff in my distro, including a zine called Multiplicities that is the first zine published from the new social movement about to sweep the world - riot grrrrrrr press.

Friday, August 1, 2008

sister shuffle

My new band, Sister Shuffle is me and my sister, Miguel and his sister Tessa.
Upcoming shows:
Aug 5 - Columbus, with Black Rainbow - somewhere under a bridge with a generator. Or maybe at Chad and Brian's house.
Tuesday Aug 11th or 12th (whichever tuesday is) in Athens Ohio with This Bike is a Pipebomb. at Brown Street House.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

present for maggie

Hi Maggie, are you out there? Maggie who lives in Brooklyn?
I made this for you. (make sure the volume is on. It might take a little while for the sound to come on)
click here for present

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

bitch magazine is hiring

My good friend Debbie from Bitch magazine sent me this

Please spread as far and wide as you possibly can...

Here at Bitch, we’re in search of a perfect someone to join our tiny
but dedicated staff as a program director (full-time) at our office in
Portland, Oregon. Someone bright, with a deep talent and love for
analyzing media/pop culture from a perspective rooted in social/
economic justice, who’s passionate about both print publishing and
newer (to us, at least) forms like online, audio, and video, someone
excited about helping shape the future of the work we do at Bitch (and
who recognizes Bitch’s potential), someone committed to DIY/grassroots
operating, who understands Bitch’s role as both critiquing what’s
crappy and praising what’s good, who’s as excited about Bitch as a
multimedia organization as Bitch as a magazine…

All that and more. We’re asking for a lot, yes, but as the saying
goes, You’ll never get what you don’t ask for.

As we mentioned, we are a tiny staff (hi, there are five of us!).
We’re also at a critical moment. For the first time in our 12-year
history, we’re not in financial crisis (if you’re familiar with the
realities of independent publishing, you’ll know this is a huge
accomplishment). We’re beginning the process of infusing our work with
a set of core values and visions. And though we were originally
created as just a magazine, our work is evolving into a movement. In
many ways we have unlimited growth potential.

In other words, we have some exciting things happening, part of which
is bringing a new organization into being. This is what “nonprofit
gurus” call an organizational refounding – evolving, moving forward,
asking questions, creating space for new visions and voices.

So what would your role at Bitch be?

Right now we’re calling it a program director position, but this could
change depending on the outcomes of this search and our visioning
process. In many ways our program director will be like the editorial/
content director for the magazine (and may also be involved in our
website, but we’re hoping to create an additional position soon for
someone to oversee the site), but since we’re so much more than our
editorial content, the program director will also be responsible for
helping direct and maintain the vision of the organization, as well as
things like fundraising, outreach, attending events, doing some public
speaking, and just generally being a huge advocate for Bitch. In other
words, we’re looking for someone who’s a highly skilled editor and is
excited about helping us grow as an organization and reach our

Also, though we’ve grown tremendously since the magazine was
originally founded (we currently print about 50,000 copies of each
issue), we’re still very much a DIY operation and want to remain that
way. Our grassroots publishing model is integral to our work, so we’re
looking for someone who’s as committed to that as we are. We’re
looking for someone who will actively seek out ways of publishing
quality (critical, thoughtful, etc.) content while being mindful of
our tight budget, and is excited about helping us evolve into a
multimedia organization

Experience/skills that are essential to this position:
- At least three years features/developmental editing experience
- Strong familiarity with past and present trends in media and pop
- Excellent communication and organizational skills
- Excellent grasp of grammar and spelling
- Stellar proofreading and copyediting abilities; familiarity with
Chicago style
- Proficiency with Excel, Word, and InDesign
- A strong capacity to multi-task, prioritize, and delegate
- Experience with web writing/editing
- Experience with video and podcasting technology a major plus

Personality traits/skill sets that are helpful in a small organization
like ours:
- Clear and frequent communication
- Ability to collaborate and share decision-making in small groups
- Ability to think creatively even when resources are tight
- Strong initiative, drive, and self-direction, ability to work
- A sense of humor

As an effort to live out our commitment to systemic social change and
grassroots organizing, we encourage politically radical folks from
marginalized identities/backgrounds (people of color, people from poor
and working class backgrounds, queer-identified folks, etc.) and
others committed to anti-oppression, collective, grassroots organizing
work to apply.

In the interest of transparency, you should know:
- Regrettably, the only way to our office is up a set of about 15
stairs. We are not wheelchair-accessible.
- The job is based in Portland, Oregon, and unfortunately we’re unable
to cover moving expenses (unless you would like to start a fundraising
campaign for the cause).

Please include a cover letter that addresses these questions
(apologies if these seem like hoops, but we hope you’ll understand
that we have a lot riding on these decisions):
* What would you like us to know about you, and what you’d bring to
* How long have you been reading Bitch, and what has your perception
of it been through that time? (Please be honest; we’re not sensitive
and constructive criticism is always welcome.)
* In what ways do you identify (or not) with the word feminist?
* What do you think of both the title Bitch and the subtitle Feminist
Response to Pop Culture? (If you could change one/both of them, what
would you change them to?)

Salary and Benefits:
* $33,680/year, salary, exempt, paid medical/dental/vision

Closing date for applications: July 31
Anticipated start date: mid-August

Please email detailed cover letter (*answering all the questions,
please!*), resume and three references to
Please write “program director position” in the subject line.
Or mail to: B-Word, Debbie Rasmussen, 4930 NE 29th Ave, Portland, OR
No phone calls, faxes, or drop-ins. No, no!

Friday, July 11, 2008

new zine!

I have a new zine out! I know! Already!
ok, not quite yet, but in a couple weeks. It is at the printer right now. If you want to preorder, you can go to the doris website or send a couple dollars and some stamps to pob 29 athens ohio 45701. or tell your local bookstore or record store to order some!

also in the doris news, at the SF zine fair on the 19th at 4:00 I'll be doing a talk and question and answer.

call for mrr health issue

Dear colleagues in punk,

In reflection on Lance Hahn's tragic and premature death last October, and the accumulating health concerns of many of the rest of us as we totter into our 30s, 40s, 50s, and 60s, we at MRR have decided to put out a Punks & Health special issue.
The focus of this issue will be on how we can navigate the broken health care system to best take care of ourselves. It will be dedicated to Lance, who was so much a part of MRR and the scene for so many years, and hopefully it can also be a forum to remember the others we have lost in these last decades. Lance's early death might well have been avoided. Some of us are ill right now, or might be soon. It's time we start paying attention.

There is no denying that we sometimes put ourselves in the path of risk. But we also have extraordinary resources available to avoid and confront these "special" risks, as well as the ordinary perils of growing older. In some ways the punk community is ahead of mainstream America: biking, diet, community support, etc. We want to cover all of this: the good and the bad, the self-destructive and the redemptive.
Rather than having this issue be a mind-numbing collection of articles about obscure herbal treatments, I envision a funny, personal, conflicted issue with plenty of argument about methods; art, comics, and memoirs ("My First Punk Rock Injury" What's The Scoop, for example); along with some excellent, solidly researched articles about the state of health care and health. Interviews with older punks would be very helpful. Were there things they did that affected their health that they regret now? What health issues are they now facing (arthritis in their hands from guitar-playing? deafness? other things?) What advice do they have for younger punks?

Some topics to consider:
Routine Health
Trainhopping and similar exploits
Taking care of chronic conditions.
Sexual healthHPV/STDs.
Women's health
Annual check-ups
Transgender health care issues
Alternative health care
Mental health: depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, etc.
Big picture; universal health care, alternatives? Candidates? Solutions?
Exercise: punk rock sports.

Some big questions:
How do we navigate the broken system, as punks -- find creative solutions? How do our attitudes and behaviors keep us unhealthy? How can we take better care of ourselves and each other?

And formats:
What's the Scoop Returns Photos Art Short "memoirs", like, "my trip to the ER" or whatever. Interesting punks interviewing other interesting punks, asking interesting questions. "Instructional" pieces, like, "When should you listen to the doctor and when should you tell him to fuck off?" Reprints of great shit you've seen elsewhere.
Please deseminate far and wide. I'd love to hear from you and start brainstorming with you. Deadline is August 5.
Thanks for reading.Arwen

Monday, July 7, 2008

mrr column - louise

I keep forgetting to post my mrr columns. here's an old one I forgot to put up here.


Sometimes a new girl would move to our town who would be so punk that I would refer to her as "the one true punk girl". Louise was one of those girls - mohawk, fish-nets, bullet belt, black eyeliner. She helped start up a new show space when the possibility of there ever being a place for shows seemed hopeless, then she was the singer for the punk-as-fuck band Resserectum.

I remember running in to her one day, and she was dressed kind of square, and she said "do you think I look ok for court?" but she wasn't going because she'd been arrested, she was going as an advocate, working for a place called "Women At Risk". A year later my friend Molly was arrested for inciting a riot and assaulting a police officer. She was in the holding cell with bunch of other women, and somehow Louise's name came up, and Mollie was like "Louise! She's my friend!" and a few of the women couldn't say enough about how fucking great Louise is. This is when Louise became one of my heros.

Here is a quick little interview with her:

Q: Do the punks judge you for being involved in social work?

A: At first when I first got out of college and started working with Women At Risk I had some friends who were critical and who said I didn't do enough activism anymore. I see my job as activism. I feel like for 40 hours a week I'm doing activism, so my energy for other projects that I was doing before in the activist community was a little bit lower. There were people who had the stereotypical response "why do you want to work within the court system, why do you want to work in the jail, why do you want to be a part of the system?" because for some folk that goes against their punk values and what you need to do to be a punk. That critique was hard to hear at first, but it seemed mainly to come from people who didn't know much about the work that I did or people who didn't have the same viewpoints I have around activism. I feel like the longer I've been doing it the more used to it people have become, and I've had some people really tell me they think the work is amazing, how can they get involved, so it feels like it's changing. I don't know if that's because of who I choose to be around has changed, or if it's just become more socially acceptable, or if it's just like "ok, this is what Louise does, that's part of her identity". I'm not quite sure, and also the same thing about talking about my work, when I first started working there, I would talk about it at shows, and when I was having a beer at Rosettas, and it definitely got a bad reception.

Q:Why do you think?

A: Part of it that it's really tragic awful stuff, some of the stories I hear from women I work with are kind of unbelievable and it's too hard to hear. I don't think people were being disrespectful, it was just too heavy and too hard for people to want to hear about.And I respect that. But I have had to really seek out and find people who I can talk to.

Q: What exactly is Women At Risk and what do you do there?

A: Women At Risk is a alternative sentencing program for women who are involved in the criminal justice system. We advocate for women that instead of prison sentances they get access to mental health and substance treatment.

I am a case manager and outreach coordinator. As a case manager, I help women with housing, drive them to the food bank, help them access free or low cost child care, help them get access to medical care. We problem solve with them on all the issues that are getting in the way of them staying clean and sober in recovery, or being "successful" with their probation. Alot of the women have substance charges and poverty related charges, and because of their trauma histories and substance abuse, and the fact that they're women and often times poor women, and often poor women of color, there's a lot of barriers to being "successful" with probation and avoiding prison.

As an outreach coordinator, I go to the cell block in the buncombe county jail twice a week and meet with women and come up with plans to try and get them out of jail and avoid prison time and how to get treatment and housing and all those things that they need. A lot of it is coordinating resources, and part of it is they need to talk, so it's also like therapy.

Q: Is it non profit or is it government funded?

A: It's a private non-profit. We get some funding from state legislator, some funding from the Department of Corrections, because it costs somewhere around $70 a day to keep a woman in prison and $7 a day to have a women in our program, in the community with their family.

We've been able to get, surprisingly, Republicans on our side. We get some money from the ABC board, because they have to donate a percentage of their profits to substance treatment centers, and we have an amazing director who gets grants from a whole lot of different places.

The great thing about it is we get to run our program in the way we think it should be done, how we designed it. We aren't managed by any State entity at all, so we are able to create programs that are based on the women's needs and not based on some hierarchy or state organization that tells us how we can do our program.
Also, it's it's basically a feminist organization, and it's really different than working in most other social work. My coworkers know that I'm a punk, and that I do transgender activism. A lots of places aren't like that. It helps to be able to integrate my different worlds at least a little bit.

Q: Has working there changed your feeling about punk?

A: It's changed everything about my life. It's validated and confirmed my belief system about the prison system, it's hard and terrify to see that in fact the prison system is classist, racist, sexist, all those things, so while that's hard, it also validated my belief system.

There is kind of a tension between my involvement in the community and my work. Like I have to be at work at 9am so I can't go to every show that happens during the week, but also working in mental health and substance abuse, it's been hard for me to see how sometimes in the punk community these issues aren't really addressed. ...It's hard to see what can happen with addiction to these women who are like in their 50's, or 40's or even younger, who have been dealing with it forever, and then being around my peers, who I sometimes see as, I want to be careful with how I say this because I don't want to judge and we are all working on our shit in different ways, but sometime I fear that their lives could become unmanageable. So I've learned a lot around that and it's given me the opportunity to look at myself and what I need and how to address my own issues, which has been awesome and I had never even thought about it when I started working.

Also, working in the criminal justice system, I really have to be careful about getting arrested. So I'm not climbing around on rooftops or breaking into abandon buildings, and some of the kind of wild fun things that the punks are into, you know, drinking 40's at the railroad tracks, I can't do that, I mean, that's not a huge loss, but there are times, for example we had a show on Halloween at the new warehouse show space and the cops came and I felt like it was important for me to just get out of there, and definately when the war started, at the rallys I had to be careful about how far I wanted to go with my street level activism. Because if I get arrested, they'll say, "Oh, Women at Risk, they're criminals too."

It was hard at first to give up fun, living on the edge type activities. It was a big adjustment, even dying my hair and cutting my hair changed. I couldn't just show up with a rat tail and purple bangs anymore, which wasn't that big of a deal, but there were times when image stuff was really hard for me - not feeling like I could always represent who I was even ascetically, and what I've known for 10+ years. Learning how to dress to go into court - at first I felt like it was drag. I was like, "I can do this. It's just drag". I still haven't figured it all out. Part of me still wants to show my style, but at the same time, I want to be the best advocate for my clients in court. I've got to play by some rules, and you know, it's not about me.

Overall it's really awesome. My clients give me a kind of strength in a lot of ways, and I've learned so much from them that I can apply to life myself. Being able to meet with people and hear their stories and be available to them has been such a rewarding gift and so life changing, that all that other stuff, no more mohawks and all that, it's such a small price to pay.
(editors note: although she may not still have a mohawk, she is still totally punk as hell, and her band Subramanium has a 7" that just came out)

Q: What do you love about punk? What keeps you in it?

A: It's been a huge part of my life for about half of my life at this point. So, I don't really know another way. This is how I grew up. And I think that for most of us, it is the only way we could have survived, and to grow and blossom and become creative and work through the things that we see and experience in our lives. And while there can be contention between being a punk and doing social work in the criminal justice system, I think that it is this lens that I have developed in my punk community that led me here and has allowed me to make it here and be so moved to do this work.

What keeps me motivated? Part of it is community. These are my people. Despite some folks who have responded more rigidly to my work choices or have not done their peice to support me as a woman in the punk scene (you know who you are) the majority of the punks that I love are interested in my work and my music and my activisim and we are always looking for ways to work together on our new projects, new showspaces, new zines. Also, music is a huge peice. I grew up in a musical family and all of my family memebers are currently playing in several bands. For me, it is a viable outlet. It is sometimes one of the only accessible outlets. When therapy gets too expensive and close friends pull back, I have a totally constructive and acceptable venue to scream at the top of my lungs and everyone there wants to hear it! It is not intrusive or fucked up to scream it out in band practice or at shows, we're all in it together

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

sf zine fest

Here I will be. With my new issue! of Doris 26!

Friday, June 27, 2008

Spooktober! shows!

My new bassist is in another sweet band called Spooktober, which is two sweet 20yearold boys who play guitar and bass and sing about halloween and stuff, and a Casio keyboard plays the beats. I love them. You should go to their East coast shows if you are into that kind of thing and live out there. I am trying to help them book their tour. We are still looking for shows in Philly (july 17) and Richmond(July 19).
I'll post the rest of the shows when I get the more solid info.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

upcoming events

Reading Tour with Erick Lyle who'll be reading from his new amazing book
On The Lower Frequencies
I'll be reading old and new doris stuff.
June 11 Baltimore Red Emmas
June 12 DC Brian McKenzie Infoshop I think
June 13 NYC Bluestocking Books
June 14 Philly A Space
June 15 Brooklyn, Goodbye Blue Monday, on Broadway near DeKalb
June 16 Brattleboro
June 17 Boston Lucy Parsons
June 18 Providence RI
June 19 Amherst

then I'm going to be in SanFrancisco for the SF zine fair July 19-20. I'm going to be doing a speech/question and answer thing, so if you're going to be there are you have some questions you want me to talk about, may be you can tell me here, because I'm usually not very good at answering things when I'm put on the spot, unless I have time to think about it ahead of time.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Chronic Pain zine - call for submissions

(this is a call out for a zine that is going to be really great. It's not me who's putting it together, but I'm trying to write something for it.)

Please take part in my yet-to-be named Chronic Pain Zine project. I am looking for anyone interested in submitting writing or easy-to-reproduce visual art/comics on the subject and experience of Chronic Pain.

Personally, I'm not as interested in pain management (drugs, therapies, treatments) as in the social and emotional aspects of living with chronic pain. I want to hear about the way persistent pain impacts people's lives, relationships, and the way that they inhabit their bodies and communities. How has the pain experience informed how you identify yourself, how you feel about your body, and how you ask for help? In what way has pain pushed you toward change? Ideally this zine will be about support, sharing, and respecting what we've been through with pain. Below are some ideas I've brainstormed for pieces¦ anyone want to run with any of these topics?

- Asking for help in a Do-It-Yourself community
- Body Image / Identity and Chronic Pain
- Sex and Chronic Pain
- Chronic Pain and Introspection / Change
- Relationships and Chronic Pain
- Creativity and Chronic Pain
- Mental Health / Depression and the Pain Experience
- The Invisibility of Pain
- Upbringing / How were you raised to approach pain?
- Book Reviews / Chronic Pain Reading Guide
- Your ideas go here¦.

Additionally: are you a punk rock health care practitioner - or - a partner to a person in pain? What ideas and stories about care giving and support do you have to share?

This project and its time line are just taking shape but my goal is to have a finished first issue by the end Aug. in time for the Portland Zine Symposium. I love to hear from interested participants ASAP, and have extended the submission deadline to July 1st. Please repost, tell your friends, and pass this far and wide. You can contact me with comments, questions, or submissions:

Monday, April 28, 2008

tour etc

So, does anyone on the East coast have a car or truck they'd want to lend me and Erick for our little East Coast tour in June? I know it's long shot, but just thought I'd ask.

what I have been reading: The Year of Magical Thinking, by Joan Didion
what I have been promoting: friendship dates
what I've been doing: eating salads made of flowers. edible food hike camptrip.
what I've been planning: song share, pond party cookout for Mid May.
what's a song share? it's when everyone picks a few good songs for singing together and then makes photocopies of the lyrics and then you all get together and learn the songs so you can sing songs together which is something that is so great to do.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

scene not heard zine

Call for Submissions

Scene Not Heard Zine
Sexism in Punk, Activist and Radical Communities
Is accepting submissions . . .

Some ideas (by no means limited to):
personal stories
art/creative writing/poetry
histories and institutional memories (stories about your scene/community)

body image
sexism and sexual harassment at activist gatherings
standing up to the patriarchy through art, organizing, music, zines etc.
violence/sexualized violence towards all genders
punk music and mosh pits: dismantling and reinforcing gender, patriarchy, sexualized violence, and expectations of manhood
sexism and sexual harassment in the activist community that formed in New Orleans after Katrina
'manarchism': who has access and who sets the group agenda
radicalism as a means of empowerment vs. scene cred dictating values and new social norms

I am looking for a wide-range of viewpoints and opinions. Queer/trans individuals, people of color, women and men and everyone and everything in between!

Email submissions/questions/ideas to:
Please get them in by: July 1st

Friday, April 25, 2008


It's strange trying so hard to make new friends. I go downtown every day and sit. write letters. sit in the sun waiting for anyone I have even vaguely met to walk by. I talk loud. I tell stories. I come up with big plans and group things. like lets find jerseys with numbers and become a gang. a singing gang. ASC Athens Singing Club. I am looking for a keyboard player. I am looking for a motorcycle. I am looking for a life that is more than what is given. I am trying to make this life. more. but I want secrets. I want to know the hard behind the laughs. I want to know what drives us. what keeps us from being real. I want want want. always

Sunday, April 6, 2008

e. coast tour

I'm going on reading tour in June with Erick Lyle, (formally Iggy Scam) who has a new book coming out on Soft Skull Press called On The Lower Frequencies:The Secret Life of Cities, Hopefully this is what it will be:

June 11 Baltimore Red Emmas
June 12 DC the Black Cat
June 13 NYC Bluestocking Books
June 14 Philly A Space
June 15 Brooklyn, Goodbye Blue Monday, on Broadway near DeKalb
June 16 Brattleboro
June 17 Boston Lucy Parsons
June 18 Providence RI
June 19 Amherst

also, here a link to Ericks book
On The Lower Frequencies

zine about learning good consent

I'm helping work on a zine about positive consent experiences. We really need people's stories and advice. Here is a link to the flyer. thanks. flyer


Oh, Ohio. We thought we had found home real home. and then what happens? they are opening up power plants and remining everything for coal. Here, where most people don't own the minerals under thier land so the companies can come and take it all out from under you, wreck the water table. ruin everything.
so where? where now?

sobriety zine

Call for Submissions

Being Sober
This is one of my favorite definitions of sober:
showing self-control
I know plenty traditionally "sober"/straightedge folks
that do all sorts of terrible self righteous
compulsive bullshit and plenty friends who drink and
are on top of their shit. I'm interested in people who
make the conscious decision to be present, responsive,
and accountable to themselves, their partners, their
family their community and communities at large. It's
up to you to decide what you need and can handle.

Having Fun
In my experience this responsibility is overwhelming
some times. Being sober can seem really constraining
when everyone seems to do things so easily when drunk.
things get awkward some times but I have learned how
to fuck, speak, listen, consent, dance, play, read,
socialize, scream, run from cops and be free since I
got sober 6 years ago. Right now I love being
supportive to my friends, reading autobiographies by
strong women of color, gardening and drinking
dumpstered tea.

What do you like to do?

I'm excited by your stories and comics about doing
what you love while being sober. This could be about
yr past, present or future exploits.

send me yr submissions to
2921 Hilligass ave
Berkeley CA 94705

5 x5 1/4 format
or email them to and I'll make
em pretty

Friday, March 21, 2008

radical survivor asheville

This is a new group starting up in Asheville that I think would be great if people got involved in.
radical survivor asheville

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

March 13, Seattle

OK! update. I will be reading at Left Bank books in Seattle, March 13 at 7:00, hopefully with a couple other people - like Nealy from Mend My Dress.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

study + friends

I remembered, when I can't figure out how to get my head to work, study always helps. Active reading, taking notes, thinking hard about things outside myself.

I have been thinking about how much nicer it is when we tell eachother what we like about eachother. I seriously think hardly any of us get enough acknowledgement, and a lot of times we focus on the negative things about our friends, or if we think our friends are great, we compare ourselves to them and think we suck. but why? So many of us feel so lonely and unappreciated and self hating, so I want to recommend that we start practicing telling eachother what inspires us about eachother. a lot.

Friday, February 22, 2008


I just want to aknowledge how hard it is to do almost anything half the time. I think sometimes that people think that they are the only ones who struggle with motivation and despair and committment and getting shit done, but if you feel alone, you are not. It is so fucking hard to keep going and stay focused. Like, right now I am trying to start on this writing project, and I said I would write on it for 3 hours today, but I just scratch away and think of a million reasons why I can't write it, why I don't know enough and can't focus enough and don't write good enough and what if I get it wrong. And I just want to go work, do some mindless tasks. This is the struggle. to keep going despite it all.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

books I need

Hi! I am about to start working on my political autobiography, which sounds kind of weird and self-important, but it's really more about the political stuff that has been going on in my lifetime than about me. But I have a lot of research I need to do, so if anyone has books about these subjects that they don't want anymore, let me know. You can send them to pob 29 athens oh 45701:

Alternative Schools in the 70's
Sanctuary Movement
US intervention in Central America
bombing of Granada
Anti-Aparthied Movement + US Divestment from S.Africa
Reganomics + funding cuts for artists
Deep Ecology + Social Ecology vs Deep Ecology
Judi Bari
Co-op Movement in Minneapolis (from the 50's or whenever)
Love and Rage
Gurilla Girls
Riot Girl Movement
Self-Defense Movement
Sex Wars (anti-porn vs pro-erotic freedom or pro-sex)
Media Representation of social movements since the 80's
James Bay
Prarie Island
Punk (espcially 80's and 90's punk stuff)
Straight Edge Movement
Fetal Subjectivity
Rise of the Christian Right - especially about their tactics getting on school boards, etc.
Clinic Defense
Beginnings of the WTO, World Bank and IMF - or overviews of how all that developed
Identity Politics
Class Identity and the shrinking of US Middle class
Free Trade + US companies moving to Mexico, etc
500 Years of Resistance
Food Not Bombs
Autonomen (I don't know how to spell it - German radicals)
Squatting in US
Zines (I don't want a bunch of zines, because I have tons, but maybe a book about them)
War on Drugs
War on Terror
Incarceration of African-Americans + the Prison Industrial System
Iraq Wars

I know there's a lot I'm forgetting right now. It'll all come together better once I'm in the writing.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Jazz Brunch

Oh, Baltimore. Once upon a time there was a church that was falling apart and couldn't pay their bills, and had been involved in radical stuff since forever, and so they approached the Anarchist bookstore, Red Emma's, and asked if they would like to do community events in the big room in the church. So they helped fixed it up and they have events, even punk shows in there. But what I went to was Jazz Brunch, which I figured would just be a silly punky thing, and I learned a jazz song to sing, "My Cat Arnold", by Karen Mantler. Because I'd heard that if you brought an instrument you got $4 brunch instead of $7. But when I got there it was the sweetest, more commuinity kind of thing I'd ever really seen. It was punks at the door and serving the food, but it was all kinds of people. all ages and not just white. and there was a real jazz band playing that was two kids who were probably about 15, and three older people. And the line for brunch was out the door. there were big tables, lots of them, and a girl with long dreads and a good loud voice who was a welcomer, and welcomed each section of the line, explaining how it worked. The welcomer made it feel so welcoming! So much less confusing and more fun, less alienating. I wish all punk/anarchist spaces would remember about being welcoming, and making a point to really do stuff like that.
Jazz Brunch. I love Jazz Brunch!

Sunday, February 17, 2008


A lot of people lately have been asking me what I think accountability is. I have recently been trying to demand accountability from two people who are assaulters. One of them is an ex-good friend of mine, who was totally clueless about the fact that he assaulted someone - he thought it was consentual but was totally willing to accept the survivors experience. I don't think that in his heart he really sees himself as a perpetraitor though.

I think everyone needs to hold perpetraitors accountable, and that if the person isn't doing serious, ongoing work to learn and change, that they need to go to counciling. Friends who are trying to help rehabilitate the perpetraitor need to consistantly demand that they go to counciling.

In a couple instances lately, perpatrators I have known have gone to counciling that was specifically for rehabiliting perpatrators, and these councilors usually deal with people who have been court ordered to go there. I wish these worked, but I feel like these councilors have downplayed the importance of more subtle forms of abuse and consent, and have made the perpatrators feel like what they did was no big deal.

I have gotten a lot of criticism about the tactic of ostricizing perpetraitors from communities, and a lot of talk about how the perpetraitor is not going to change if people aren't staying friends with them. I believe that ostricization is a powerful tool. I believe that people are capable of making fundamental changes in themselves, but I have seen over and over again that many people are not willing to make these changes until their lives become too fucking uncompfortable for them to avoid dealing with it. Ostricization makes people uncomfortable. Friends of the perpetrator who believe that they can help the perpetraitor change need to be consist and active in pushing for accountability and change. there is a fine line between being an enabler and helping someone change.

I expect friends to make demands on the perpetraitor, to talk to the people in the larger community about what they are doing, what progress is being made, and to ask the larger community what expectations and demands they have.

I have also heard a lot of talk about "what is community", and how we don't really have one so how can anyone be held accountable. I think this is bullshit. Community doesn't have to be super tangeble to be real. If you work with someone, if you go to the same places as them (shows, coffee shops), if you live in the same neighborhood or town or even city, all those things count. Community accountability is about breaking out of the "none of my business" mentality that has allowed abuse to happen and contiuing happening. It is all of our responsibilities to speak out and stop abuse.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

baltimore and Seattle reading

I'll be in Baltimore doing a zine reading thing at Red Emmas bookstore on Feb 18, at 7pm. and in Seattle on March 9th I'm not sure what time.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

mrr column 3

i forgot to post this one.

What was it that brought you into punk? was it just the music or that you couldn't fit in. Was it so much anger inside of you that had no way out? Was it the emptiness of pop music and looking for something more. Was it rebellion, pure and simple? Was it because you had a punk crush? Was it because it was cool? What has it grown into? Was it because punk was the only thing that could keep you alive.
What brought you into it, and what are you going to do now? The reasons we start aren't always enough to hold us steady. We have to constantly rethink what we want from where we are, and how are we going to move forward, once we have treaded water long enough, once we have learned how to swim. We have to recreate what punk means in our lives so we don't just turn our backs on it when we grow.
There is so much pushing on us, so much capitalist bullshit standard beauty crap what makes us worthwhile what shit our parents shoved at us what shit our schools did, and the magazine adds and the shitty music and lack of culture or patriarchial culture, and shoved at us "why don't you smile", and meaningless debates where they don't even begin to ask the right questions, and lovelessness and alienation and despair.
So yeah, it makes sense to define ourselves as other. as against all that regardless of whether or not we know what we're for. But I want to know, someday, what you want to create. I want to know what's the revolution we're gonna make? Because it's Us vs. Them? but who is them exactly? Is it my 91 year old grandma? who was talking to me about the gay rodeo. She said "I used to think gay people deserved to die, but now I just can't imagine what my problem was!"
Is them my mom, who never made it out of the suburbs, and couldn't figure out a way to resist beyond school boardes and unshaved armpits, and teaching us daughters that we could do anything. who it took 13 years to get out of an abusive relationship, and by then it was too late, the aftershocks killed her.
Is them my older sister, events coordinator at Dartmouth college, who is too afraid of the world to let her kids play outside, and whose method of survival requires holding tight to forgetting and denial.
Is them the kids who aren't punk enough or the kids who are punker than thou. the ones who don't care about anything other than drinking and fucking shit up, or the ones who are so self righteous in their politics you can't even talk to them. Is it the old punks for leaving or the young ones for repeating the same actions and making the same mistakes. And what is the difference between critique and infighting?
In Andrea Dworkin's book Heartbreak: The Political Memoir of a Feminist Militant, she says "I learned never to ignore the reality of power pure and simple. I also learned that one could get a bunch of people to do something brave or new or rebellious, but if it didn't come from their deepest hearts they could not maintain the honor of their commitment... nor can rhetoric create in people a sustained determination to win".
What is the revolution we're going to make? What is deepest in our hearts? I know that sometimes all we can do is figure out a way to stay alive, but after that, what is it we're feeling and what are doing just because it's been set up for us to do. I want us to think hard and often about what it is we're trying to create, what is deepest in our hearts, and not just what we hate or what's simple.
A friend of mine recently came out to me as being not an anarchist. She said she thought people were inherently lazy, and I know I live in my own little bubble of denial in my head, but I cant believe that's true. I think so many of us work really hard in a world that is so against us. I've seen so many people work hard just to live. people doing the hard work of surviving incest, surviving rape, surviving partners who tell them they're shit, surviving being beaten, being ignored, being not believed. And if we are doing this hard work, there's got to be a deep desire in the rest of us.
Right now. I want you to think seriously about what kind of world you want, and how we can take steps to get there. I want us to talk with our friends about real things, and cut the bullshit. Like if you talk shit about women, what are the reasons behind it? what is the benefit for you? what do you think might be the actual real ways it hurts us. If you dismiss people who are trying to change the world, I want you to challenge your dismissal, and to think seriously about what it is you don't like about their ideas or tactics, and what it is you think should be done differently, and how can you work to make that happen?
It's time to work hard. I want to uncover our secrets and our lost abilities. I want us to stop making fun of each other. I want us to feel deeply and to love and to learn to trust our bodies and to learn which people we can trust and who is trying to trick us.
I want us to stop worrying so much about whether or not we feel like we belong, stop trying to prove ourselves. Nothing is comfortable in this world even if we can find bits and pieces of it, bits and pieces of community. I want us to be able to agree to disagree on things. I want us to encourage a diversity of identities and a diversity of tactics. I want us to study. There is an embarrassing lack of political knowledge and shallow political rhetoric that doesn't sustain us. I want us to embrace challenge, and to fight for what we belive, and to stand up for each other, to learn how to live in different worlds. I want to sew it all together, the ways we fight and create and think, not a single thread all mashed together in fake unity, but a net of identity, culture, resistance, community, and family, to catch the ones who are falling. to break their fall.
At the Black Bear, Butcher Wolf, Red Herring show, Chris Somerville from Black Bear says into the microphone, "This song is about the problems that arise when people are divided from the natural world." and if the basement had been packed and the amps had been louder, the force of the music could have pushed us all together and the violin bow as a needle could have sewn up the divisions and the revolution would have streamed out through everything. As it was, I could only stand there with my hand on my heart, trying to hold it in.

Friday, February 8, 2008

Seattle Doris Reading?

I think I'm going to be in Seattle on March 9. I don't know if I have any dorisy people in that sweet city, and I've never been there before. but if anyone is out there, and thinks I should try and do a reading somewhere, tell me! where?

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

how to built stuff

sometimes i used to not build things because I thought I didn't know how. Now I have been building things for a long time. I don't know if you can tell how crooked this is, but it is very crooked. who cares. it stands up. here is how you do it. find wood. cut it. if you use a circular saw and you have long hair, make sure not to get your hair in the moving sawblade. cut little strips of wood for the shelves to rest on. If you are hammering them in or screwing them in and the wood keeps splitting, drill holes first. the holes should be a little smaller than the nails or screws. I totally recomend this drilling step. It takes away a lot of frustration.
measure, or just put everything near eachother and guess.
to make it not so tippy, put a board going diagonal against the back, and then screw this into the wall.

Friday, February 1, 2008

ride to balitmore

these are my old roommates new pigs.

i am trying to find a ride to baltimore, (from athens or columbus ohio). anyone? I know it's a long shot.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

doris 25!

I just finshed Doris 25! but I think it's going to take about a month to get it printed.
My friend Kitty who is a tattoo artist told me that someone got a doris tattoo by her the other day. If it's you, send me a picture! I want to see!
My friend Michael has a new blog with some really sweet dance videos on it. check it out if you like that kind of thing.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

hpv zine

I just got the HPV zine by the Down There Health Collective, and it is so good. To get a copy send $2 in money or stamps to hpv zine, 737 Quebec Place NW, WDC, 20010. It is really informative and comprehensive. My sister helped edit it a lot.
to get the pdf file, you can email them at or at .

what I'm reading:
That's Revolting: Queer Strategies for Resisting Assimilation, ed Mattilda
All I'm Asking for is My Body, by Milton Murayama

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

mrr column 4

Consent Thought Manipulation Is Not Consent

Part of the tradition of punk is getting drunk and fucking, but I'm tired of everyone being fucked with when they don't want it. I don't know if statistics are higher in the punk scene, if childhood sexual abuse survivors are drawn to this rebellion, but almost ever girl I know was abused when they were young, and most of the trannies, gender queers and guys I know too. My guy friends who were abused almost always have never heard of it happening to boys, they almost always don't want to talk about it. It is terrible, the isolation and silence of it all. And almost everyone I know has had shit happen to them when they're older. People fucking them when they're drunk and couldn't give consent, people fucking with them when they're sleeping, people manipulating them into false consent. Consent through manipulation is not consent. It is not a game. It is real, the damage it does.

So this is what we carry with us, histories of abuse, piled up with more abuse. Sex doesn't happen in a vacuum, each time holds memories of this shit, or the energy expended holding back the memories. A lot of times we have mixed feelings, a lot of times we have split and opposite feelings, a lot of times we send mixed messages, a lot of times we aren't able to say "no".

Consent is about asking. It's about getting verbal permission. It's about wanting to know the real answer, trying to get to the real answer, not just hoping to get laid. Consent is about believing someone when they say they don't want to. It's about looking for the signs, a blankness, a nervous laughter, a pushing away, and not trying to overcome the resistance. Consent is about wanting to do it because the other person wants to do it too, totally. It is about dropping the game, not trying to make the person feel guilty if they don't want to have sex, not making the person feel guilty if they want to stop something that's already started, not pressuring them. It's about respecting the humanity of the person you want to fuck. Because we are human and real and punk should be about the humanness of us all, about the smell of us and the dirt of us and the anger inside of us.

Punk should be helping each other purge the shit that our families shoved down our throats, or whoever shoved it. It should be screaming away the horror of it all. It should be anger at the world, at the meaninglessness and the stupidity. If we are going to reject all that mainstream society has to offer, we should reject the twisted fucked up way they offer up sex, and we should fight against the rape culture just as strongly as we fight against everything else.

For me, I didn't know really how to give consent. I was so used to just letting whoever wanted to fuck me, fuck me, because that's what I'd been told I was good for, and as soon as someone showed interest in me, I was afraid they'd want to fuck, and I wouldn't be able to say no, so I'd just try to jump ahead and get it over with. Sometimes it would turn out that they hadn't really been thinking that at all. I learned to give consent by asking for consent. I'd ask, is this ok? do you want to be doing this? Is it ok if I kiss you? Is it ok if I take off your pants. And I swear to you, you can still be passionately ripping each others clothes off and still asking these things.

One of the things that's been really helpful for me in giving consent, is when someone asks "do you want to be doing just this, or do you want to be doing something else." It's difficult to say what I want unless asked, and it's easier for me to ask then to tell, I think it's this way with a lot of people.

So repeat after me: I will not get into bed with someone who is passed out or sleeping and start touching them. I will not try and make out with people who are blacked out drunk. I will not sleep next to someone and pretend like I just want to sleep when really I want to fuck and I might start trying to in my sleep. I won't try to talk anyone into doing something they don't want to. If I'm going to get drunk and fuck, I will bring condoms, and I will remember to put the fucking thing on. If I am going to fuck, I will use a condom and I won't complain. I will ask for consent. I will ask for it again if the person I am having sex with starts to seem like something's not right. I will look for signs. I will ask again. If someone says they just want to kiss, I promise I will just kiss them and not try to go further. If someone says they don't want to do it, I will believe them. If someone is getting drunk with me and they say they don't want to have sex, but then later start to act sexy when they get extra drunk, I will double and triple check about it, I'll remind them that they didn't want to before, and may be I'll just go ahead and say no.

I want to recommend the zine Support. I put it together, but it's stories and articles from lots of different people, about consent and supporting sexual abuse survivors. You can order it from me for 2.50 at PO Box 1734, Asheville, NC 28802. or thought the website. also, there is a list of questions about consent that my friend Andrea and I wrote for a workshop we did on consent. This list of questions has been really useful for a lot of people. It's in the Support zine, but you can also read it at

moving to ohio

day one.
when you are allergic to everything, mold and cats and all animals and everything else, it makes it hard to stay places that aren't home. We got to Ohio. Stayed two nights at my friend Talcon's beautiful house that is part of a commune, but not communey the way it probably was in the 60's when the people all lived in one house together to start out with, and the goal was to raise kids collectively. Now it is lots of houses, and once a week pot-lucks, and certain decisions made together. Mostly older people.
I had in my mind a stereotypical idea of what a house in a commune would be like, scrubby, put together with scraps and whatever, but it is a beautiful lightfilled house, built by a woodworker, with windows everywhere, a whole side atrium with plants going up and hanging down, two stories. and a sauna. After two nights with my sister and her cat in the basement room, and my lungs closing down, I decided to sleep in the sauna.

what I'm reading: Fun Home, by Alison Bechdel.

day two
Sometimes a place just feels right and there's no explaining it. That's how I felt about Ohio. But then when we got here this time, it wasn't the same. Athens County. Maybe it was just that the leaves were gone from the trees. May be it was just that we needed home so badly and so right away. It felt ok, just not right. Then we drove down to the county we stayed in last year, and it felt like I could breathe again. It felt like this is where we belong. It felt so different and I can't say why. The land is similar, some woods, some fields, rolling hills, some falling apart houses, some trailers, some new houses. horses. goats. But it felt entirely different.

We went and looked at a yurt for rent, for temporary, while we look for something more permanent. It is on United Plant Savers land, which is a group for the preservation of endangered medicinal plants. And we stopped my the house of Joe and Wendy, who I had just talked to on the phone, and woke them up from naps, but they were so nice. They invited us to a New Years party, "it's a boring party - starts at 6:00, ends at 9." Perfect. And they invited us to come cook in their kitchen before hand. The longer we sat there the more they brainstormed up ideas of places we could live, until the brainstormed up the most beautiful country house with a garden and woods and a pond. we just have to try and get ahold of the owners before they leave Alaska and head to the Arctic Circle.